Sunday, July 17, 2016

Cloelia update

Woah, would you believe I've sold 100 copies of Cloelia? It's only been out less than a month! Thank you so much, everyone! I am delighted that you like it. If you don't like it, I can't offer refunds but please give it to someone else for free rather than burning it.

Anyway, important news! Life being the way it is, there were errors. I've put out a new version, which I'm calling v.1.1. The links to the new PDF & glossary are on the Cloelia page over here.

Click under the cut to see the detailed changes, but here's a general overview.

General Reasons for Changes

  • Word Choice: forms of alius have been reexamined and often omitted or changed.
  • Pronoun Position: personal pronouns, wherever possible, have been moved to second position to better reflect idiomatic word order. If they are in the first position, they are in most cases meant to be somewhat emphatic. The exception is "et eōs relinquō" on p. 37, which I simply couldn't do neatly. Additionally, "someone and I" phrases, e.g. "pater et ego" have been changed to "I and someone," e.g. "ego et pater" to better reflect Latin idiom.
  • Vowel Length: corrected macrons on nefās, alterīus, and forms of lacrimāre.
  • Prepositions: instances of "ēmittere ad" have been changed to "ēmittere in" to better reflect Latin usage. instances of "contra + accusative ... pugnare" have been changed to "cum + ablative ... pugnare" to better reflect Latin usage.
  • Glossary: added, removed, and changed some definitions to reflect other changes made in this version.
  • Other Changes: All other changes are marked with an asterisk and explained at the note.

Detailed Changelog

  • p. 3: removed bold formatting from table of contents.
  • p. 5: changed "mihi nōmen est" to "nōmen mihi est"; changed " tibi rem tōtam narrābō" to "rem tōtam tibi narrābō."
  • *p. 6: changed "māter et ego" to "ego et māter." Changed “volō” to “velim” and “vīs” to “velis.” Changes to subjunctive are to make things more polite.
  • p. 7 changed "tibi fābulam dē illā Camillā narrābō" to "fābulam dē illā Camillā tibi narrābō."
  • p. 8: changed "tū semper" to "semper tū;" removed "ego quoque."
  • p. 9: changed "ad eam tēlum ēmīsit" to "in eam tēlum ēmīsit."
  • p. 10: changed "vestīmenta certē tibi" to " vestīmenta tibi certē."
  • *p. 12: changed optima to bona on the advice that "tam optima" is strange in Latin.
  • *p. 13: changed mulier to mulierum on the advice that "optima mulier" did not have the force of "the best of all women."
  • p. 15: changed "ego quoque lacrimābam." to "nunc ego quoque lacrimābam."
  • p. 17: "Diāna et aliae virginēs" changed to "Diāna et virginēs;" changed "tibi fābulam dē vōtīs narrābō" to"fābulam dē vōtīs tibi narrābō."
  • p. 19: changed "nōs omnēs pudīcitiam et virtūtem Lucrētiae laudābāmus" to "pudīcitiam et virtūtem Lucrētiae nōs omnēs laudābāmus."
  • *p. 21: added "tamen" after "adhuc" to emphasize concessive nature of cum clause;  changed "nōs puellae haec vestīmenta" to "haec vestīmenta nōs;" changed "alium virum" to "tertium virum;" changed "hic alius vir" to "hic tertius vir."
  • p. 22: changed "aliī virō" to "tertiō virō."
  • *p. 24: added "tamen" after "tacitus" to emphasize concessive nature of cum clause; changed "tū mē nōn interfēcistī, sed scrībam meum" to "scrībam meum, neque me, tu interfecisti;" changed "nōbīs magis placet rēs magnās gerere quam vīvere" to "rēs magnās gerere nōbīs magis placet quam vīvere;" changed "Porsenna vīdit mē manum in ignēs pōnere" to "Porsenna vīdit ignēs manum meam cōnsūmentēs, et" for a more vivid image & added "cōnsūmentēs" to sidebar.
  • p. 25: changed "ego mīlitēs" to " mīlitēs ego."
  • *p. 26: changed "ego et Iūnia statim" to "statim ego et Iūnia;" changed "fīliae maximōrum Rōmānōrum nōs erāmus! certē nōs ipsae erāmus duae..." to "nōs fīliae maximōrum Rōmānōrum erāmus! nōs ipsae certē erāmus duae..." in order to increase emphasis on the personal pronouns.
  • p. 27: "omnēs aliae puellae" changed to "aliae puellae" and "alios captīvōs" to "captīvōs;" changed "nōs omnēs audīvimus" to "omnēs nōs audīvimus."
  • p. 29: changed "nōs nunc sumus in castrīs hostium " to "nunc nōs sumus in castrīs hostium;" changed "trāns flūmen" to "in flūmine;" changed "Rōmānī simul hostēs pugnāre..." to "Rōmānī simul cum hostibus pugnāre...;" changed "...sōlus hostēs pugnābat" to "...sōlus cum hostibus pugnābat;"  changed "... gladiō multōs hostēs pugnābat" to "tamen gladiō cum multīs hostibus pugnābat" to emphasize concessive nature of cum clause; changed changed "ad eum" with forms of ēmittō to "in eum" twice; changed "cum aliī Rōmānī" to "cum Rōmānī."
  • *p. 30: changed "cum ille sōlus hostēs pugnāvisset" to "quia ille sōlus cum hostibus pugnāverat" & removed gloss for cum causal clause. Causal clause was changed due to implied authority of cum causal clause vs. of quia causal clause.
  • *p. 31: changed "inquit alia puella" to "inquit ūna ē puellis;" changed "cum nox veniet" to "cum nox vēnerit" for idiomatic purposes and because Future Most Vivid is great.
  • *p. 32: changed "ego et aliae puellae per castra hostium īmus" to "per castra hostium ego et puellae īmus," and "quī omnēs hostēs sōlus pugnāvit" to "quī cum omnibus hostibus sōlus pugnāvit;" changed "tacita inquam" to "inquam" on the advice that you can't say anything silently; changed "nōs omnēs" to "omnēs nōs." Changed "serpimus" to "rēpimus" because "serpimus sīcut serpentēs" is awful.
  • p. 33: changed "nōs per noctem obscūram ad urbem celeriter īmus" to "per noctem obscūram nōs ad urbem celeriter īmus."
  • p. 34: changed "ego tūta sum" to "tūta ego sum;" changed "alias captīvās servavi" to "captīvās servavi;" changed "ego fortiter" to "fortiter ego."
  • *p. 35: moved "nefās" gloss to top of margin notes; changed "Porsenna dīxit sē nōbīscum dehinc" to "Porsenna dīxit dehinc sē nōbīscum;" in "sī eī captīvōs darēmus" changed eī to sibi since the pronoun refers to the subject of the main clause; changed "ad mē ēmittēbant" to "in mē emittēbant." 
  • p. 37: changed "dīcēbat tē audācem puellam esse" to "dīcēbat audācem puellam tē esse;" changed "et tū eam servāvistī, sed nunc Rōmam ipsam quoque servāre potes." to "et eam servāvistī, sed nunc tū Rōmam ipsam quoque servāre potes."
  • *p. 38: changed "serpō" to "rēpō" to accord with change on p. 32.
  • *p. 39: changed "multa" to "multās," "audāciās" to "audācēs" twice; "rīdetne rēx mihi?" changed to "rīdetne rēx mē?"; changed "poterint" to "poterunt." All these changes are because of outright mistakes!
  • p. 40: changed "... contrā hostēs Rōmae pugnābunt" to "cum hostibus Rōmae pugnābunt;" changed "relinquō" to "relinquam" because of tense mistake.
  • p. 42: changed "fortiter prō sē spectat" to "fortiter prae sē spectat" because of sense of "prō" vs. "prae sē" idiom.
  • p. 44: "alterius" changed to "alterīus;" removed nonsense word "audāciās;" removed "aliās;" changed glossary entries for singular forms of alius to "another, some" instead of just "other" and for plural forms to "(some of the) other."
  • p. 46: added "cōnsūmentēs–devouring" to glossary.
  • p. 55: added "at" as a meaning of "in" in glossary.
  • *p. 56: changed meaning for forms of pudīcitia from "sexual modesty" to "chastity" to better reflect meaning; removed "pōnere–to place, put" from glossary; added "prae–ahead, in front" to glossary and changed definition of "prō" from "for, on behalf of" to "on behalf of, in front."
  • p. 57: added "rēpimus–we crawl" and "rēpō–I crawl" to glossary to accord with changes on p. 32 & 38.
  • p. 59: "sibi" added to glossary; changed error "vident–I will see" to "vident–they see." Removed "serpimus–we creep" and "serpō–I creep" from glossary to accord with changes on p. 32 & 38.
  • p. 60: tertiō, tertium, tertius added to glossary.

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